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The Colour Green;
first of May Jeers

(Apologies to Alice Walker)

Pando Papantoniou

Someone at the door.

           Best go look, say Shug.

           Then she go all strange.Big voice at door say:

           "Hello My names Bruce Banner, sometimes called the Hulk, as you can see I seem to be stuck here, it's a long story I just need my exact co- ordinates "

           She fall back and there this big Green thing like a man, dressed in trousers staring at me.

           "You must have read the papers.The names Banner remember? O Christ what year is it?"

           Shug Say something about the time.

           "Thanks Miss.Now, I need to co-ordinates what's the name of this town. You see, it's the Leaders time machine, he fitted in some kind of booby trap device, Me and Jennifer were "

           Then up comes this woman, she's big and green like him, but not as big. No ones that big.She say calm as you like:

           "Bruce I got the name of the town, I can work out where we O hello, my names Jennifer Walters, sometimes the She Hulk, I guess you've met Bruce already "

           No Kidding.I was skairt.The big character calling himself Hulk noticed this.

           "I mean you no harm.Neither of us do.Ok, lets go ."

           The woman hand him some paper then he look all serious and say

           "Blast! er you ladies don't have a pen or pencil to spare and an abacus you wouldn't have calculators would speed things along."

           I go over and get a pencil from drawer.Next to this green guy, Mister is a joke. Best not to get him riled.Digging around I see one of those things, Shug say it a gift from someone.I rush over to give it to him.Shug say nothing never seen her so skairt. Then I see size of his hands.Then I feel skairt.

           "Thanks awfully, Miss.I'll only need them a few moments " Why he have to sound so sane and nice about it?Creatures like that not supposed to sound human. Then the green girl come in and say:

           "Really, we don't mean anyone any harm.Is there anything I can do to convince you?"

           Both me and Shug stare.Never seen a woman so tall. Almost higher than the door, and her body even Mister never looked that lean. I know men as would die to have arms that strong looking.Meantime the green man is leaning against wall, I hear him scribbling so quiet it all seems, then trying the abacus ."

"It's done all I have to do is put to co-ordinates into the computer and home we go.'

           And the green lady say:

           "Bruce we really should I mean "

           "It's only shock and surprise Jennifer .shell come out of it as soon as we leave."

           She nod her head and walk off with him muttering..

           I just wish people would stop doing double takes whenever they see us

           "Jen, this is the Past we don't exist yet "

           Just like green man said, Shug come out of it soon after. Then she made me swear never.Never talk about it again.One time it she did say, was when we got to talking God again.Got idea she couldn't see how green giants and Green giant women fitted into God's world. Least of all a green skin giant that talk like a nice like college white man.

About the Author (click here) © 2000 Christian Papantoniou, all rights reserved
 appears here by permission

Author Notes

           The use of The Color Purple motif was to jeer at the thing, of course. And the Hulk, well, The Hulk says a lot to me, especially now that the strip has a more psychological slant. The Hulk is on edge in a way no other fictional character is. For an avoidant personality like me, and an intellectual one, it suits me.

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